Dr. Eris,

I just started dating again after a breakup and I want to know your thoughts on how soon is too soon to have sex with a new partner.

Dr. Eris Suggests,

This is a common question on many singletons minds.

To be honest, it depends on what you are looking for. If you are looking to be in a monogamous, long-term committed relationship, then you should wait to have sex until you are both clear as to what your intentions are in the relationship. This doesn’t mean that you have to be committed to each other for life – but that you are only going to be with each other sexually. If you are looking for a monogamous relationship then you should not be having sex with someone until you are both clear.

If you are you looking to just have fun, then its up to you when you become sexual. I do suggest that you take care of yourself, feel comfortable, safe and use protection. Do NOT engage in sexual flings looking for a commitment. Many times women have sex with men in hopes that they will fall in love with their sexual magic and make a commitment. Don’t bank on that happening!


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